The First Brood Hive: Over 500 pages of Drone Hiving
(There be gems in here. Beware - the ancient site be large and unruly!)
The Second Brood Hive: 198 pages of eternal agony
The Third Brood Hive: 56 pages of mind bending torture
Twelvians at work.
Firstly, a warm welcome to all the new Twelvians that have recently signed up to join our loving community. This is the Drone Hive, where all employed persons (regardless of their station) are encouraged to share their stories, mundane updates, daily drudgery and other psychobabble from their working life. In this thread, all Drones are recognized as being equal in their sharing of soul shattering stories and tales of torment. It is my hope that this thread will alleviate and soothe the pandemonium that all participants of the rat-race inevitably face every working day.
I urge you to sign up to the drone roster (check the format below) - and join the mindless ranks of crystal-harvesting Drones!
There is pretty much only one rule for this thread: Keep the pictures/links Safe for Work.
Hive Drone Roster
"Uniting all Twelvian Hive Clusters"
of Hive Castle Fortinet - the Commission
Hive Specialisation: Infrastructure Drone Overseer, General to the CIO.
Actual Title: Manager, ICT Infrastructure
of Hive Does The Work So Marketing Doesn't Have To (DTWSMDHT)
Hive Specialisation: Building internets to sell you things you don't really need
Actual Title: Lead Developer
of Hive Malazer
Hive Specialisation: Training proposals/tenders, web administration & daily operations.
Actual Title: Senior Operations Executive
of Hive Games Playing at Work
Hive Specialisation: All tasks complete after five minutes, playing games for the following twelve hours.
Actual Title: Security Officer
of Hive Draconian Shitcunts
Hive Specialisation: Getting scunted for doing the right thing in lose-lose situations
Actual Title: iOS Programmer, Web Developer, Database Admin and Support Bitch
of Hive Really Really Old University Press
Hive Specialisation: Editing, project management, ebooks, using red pens (felt tip = win)
Actual Title: Managing Editor, Academic & Professional
of hive Specialty German Diesel powerhouse
Hive Specialisation: Technical support and lackadaisical tuition of the dumbs
Actual Title: National electronics training manager.
of Hive breaking your internet then fixing it for money
Aggravating Mock Support
Support Customer Service Representative
of Hive SAS
Hive Specialisation: Charging the governments to tell them they're bad at data
Actual Title: Technical Consultant (yeah now you'll totally know what I do)
of Hive Me Helpy
Hive Specialisation: Organization, Streamlining and listening to life stories and pretending to be interested
Actual Title: Personal Assistant
of Hive Mega Internets
Hive Specialization: Programming and team management.
Actual title: Lead Developer
of Hive Dig Big Holes for Profits
Hive Specialisation: Herding minion larvae, whipping carapaces
Actual Title: Maintenance Analysis & Improvement Superintendent
of Hive Sullivan Nicolaides
Hive Specialisation: Stealing blood off people for my personal gain
Actual Title: Phlebotomist
of Hive Bigass hotel between here and nowhere
Hive Specialisation: Cleaning rooms, flirting with guests, and generally trying to zone out from the terribly dull work.
Actual Title: Housekeeper Ala Maid.
of Hive Dig ALL The Holes
Hive Specialisation: Making sure people know where to dig holes to upgrade things, looking busy, and standing in front of printers destroying forests.
Actual Title: Works Coordinator
of Hive Internet Speed Demons
Hive Specialisation: Everything marketing related. Online advertising, management of the front end of the website, graphic design, product design, conversion rate optimisation, SEO, social media management, content creation. I do a lot of shit.
Actual Title: Digital Marketing Lead
Formatting Code for the Roster
(If you are a new Drone, please reply to this thread using the following code)
[i]of Hive (Your company name here)[/i]
[b]Hive Specialisation:[/b] (Your day to day job task)
[b]Actual Title:[/b] (Your job title, or what your namecard says you are)